Household Helpers

Morning place mats have been working wonderfully for two years now.  But, with summer fast approaching, I knew it was about time to set up some sort of system to let the boys know what chores I expect them to help with.  At 5 years and 7 1/2 years old, they are able to help out more around the house, especially when they are home all day.  Also, we have been discussing starting to give our boys allowance. 

All of this got me thinking about what would work best in our home.  A great excuse to look at Pinterest for inspiration... right?!  You can check out my "Parenting" board on Pinterest, where I saved some of my favorite ideas.  There are lists of developmentally appropriate chores for different ages, commentaries on linking allowance to chores (or why you might choose not to), and many creative ways to create chore charts.

The thing is that my husband and I don't want our children to think of their helping around the house as "chores."  More important, we want them to understand that certain helpful behaviors are their responsibility as a member of our household.  This mind set applies to both "chores" or jobs around the house and to routine responsibilities.  Here are a few examples of responsibilities that I expect my boys to take care of without my asking: put your shoes away when you come inside, flush the toilet, clear your dishes after you eat, throw your dirty laundry down to the basement.  So, we decided to extend the idea of our morning routine and also establish summer afternoon and evening routines where the children are reminded of their routine responsibilities.  Here are the cards:














So many ideas on Pinterest were very cute and definitely practical.  In the end, however, I decided I wanted the boys to be responsible for more than just a half dozen of the same daily chores.  Inspired by how another mother used mailboxes, I came up with our non-chore non-chart household helpers kit.  (BTW: The boys helped me decide on the name.)

See that list on the left?  Looks like a lot of household jobs, right?  Well, they each only get a half dozen maximum each day.  But this way I can change the jobs as needed.  I wanted the boys to help with whatever needed to be done on a particular day, instead of doing a set list of daily chores.  They have enjoyed having variety in what tasks they help with around the house and learning to do new jobs.  They actually begged me to hurry up and finish the project and have asked to help choose jobs!

So, here is a quick run down of how I made our kit: 1) I purchased two mailboxes at the craft store.  2) I made a name label (sticker) for each boy, and I used an awl and brads to attached two old card catalog drawer pulls (that I had stored away in the basement).  3) I printed a ticket image and a chore on each card (using sheets of business cards that I already had).  4) Then I laminated the cards (and printed a master list of jobs) and stored them in our family binder.  5) Finally, I created envelopes for each boy to "mail" them their allowance.

 

And, in case you were going to ask... We've been discussing how to handle allowance for some time.  Each family is different, but here is what we decided: Since my husband's paycheck comes every two weeks, the children get allowance every other week also.  The total paid each month equals their age in years.  (For example, when a boy is 8 years old they receive $4 twice a month.)  Allowance is an opportunity to teach our children about wise money management (saving, giving, spending) and is not linked to chores.  Because we are all part of this family, everyone in the house is expected to help with jobs (or chores) in addition to their routine responsibilities.

Morning Place Mats

What parent wants to follow their children around reminding them to take care of basics like getting dressed or to pick up after themselves?  What parent wants to nag about getting everything together before school or getting their chores done?  We're not perfect and yes my children sometimes leave a trail of dirty clothes, leave a room a disaster, or leave their lunch at home.  But, I don't want that to be our norm.  I want to raise boys with awareness and responsibility.


My children work best with routine, so I work with that.  When my oldest was in 1st grade and my youngest started 3-year-old preschool, we started setting out a place mat for each boy at breakfast.  Our oldest has always been an excellent reader, so his place mat has words.  Our youngest has a picture schedule.  The left column labeled "To Do" is their morning routine.  The right column is our version of "Get Your Gear," which is a list of what they need to gather to be ready for school.  If they are not staying on task in the morning, I simply say: "Check your chart.  Are you all ready?"

Morning place mats work for us for a variety of reasons: The boys like it.  If they are off task, I can ask a basic question and I do not have to remind them about specific responsibilities all morning.  They like being responsible and independent.  I, of course, like this too.  Also, they are motivated to get ready so they can fit in some free time (like playing or reading) before school.  Sometimes, when they don't need reminders and have been very responsible, we even let them have a little screen time before school.  It's so nice not to have rushed, stressful mornings!

This system has worked wonderfully unchanged over the last 2 years.  As the children got older, they've helped with more "chores" throughout the day.  In the morning and after school, the boys have gotten used to looking for dishes or silverware to put away, laundry to fold and put away, or another way to help out around the house.  The great thing is that jobs have gotten done with very few reminders!